Any mom will tell you that after having your first child, your life will change forever. Once you have kids, of course, it’s hard to imagine anything else. But that first one makes you rethink everything you thought you knew.
Hilary Duff learned this lesson all too well seven years ago after she gave birth to her son, Luca, whom she shares with former NHL player and ex-husband Mike Comrie.
Duff has been in the public eye since she was a child, most notably as a Disney star in the show Lizzie McGuire. Since then, she’s been one of the more accomplished child stars, and her life has never been full of drama (or at least not that we’ve seen). Duff had Luca when she was only 24 years old, and she said that becoming a mom at a young age made her lost part of her identity.
“It was a little isolating in the beginning because I didn’t have any friends that had babies yet,” the Younger star said. ”But I had been working for such a long time that it felt like a natural step for me and I always knew I wanted to be a mom. I always knew that was going to be my No. 1 priority in life. So I felt ready on some fronts and a little scared on others, but really I only got scared once I was pregnant, thinking, like, ‘Oh this is actually really happening. What if this? What if that?’”
Despite feeling like she no longer knew who she was, Duff knew that being a mom was the most important job she could have.
“I did feel like after I had him, I lost a big chunk of my identity for like maybe the first year and a half, but I don’t think that was a negative thing,” she said. “At times, I was sad about it, but you know it’s full on. I don’t remember setting him down for the first three months of life. I was obsessively googling things and I just took it really seriously that I didn’t realize how all-encompassing it would be. I knew it was the most important, biggest job in the world but you know, it looks very different once you’re just in the household with the baby by yourself all the time. It was shocking and it was also the happiest, most beautiful experience, so those two things butting up against each other is quite a strange mix sometimes.”
Don’t get her wrong, though. Duff says becoming a mom was “the happiest, most beautiful experience” she’s had. It took a little while for her to find herself again, but when she did, the actress felt unstoppable.
“[Once] you do find yourself again, you have the biggest thing under your belt that nobody can take away from you and you’re so powerful and you’re so confident. … When it was happening, maybe I was a little sad about it and I didn’t feel like I had anyone to go through the experience with, but then I came out on the other side. I’m like, ‘I’m freaking super woman and I can do anything and I have confidence for days.’ There’s so much good that comes along with it.”
Duff is now also a mom to nine-month-old daughter Banks, whom she shares with fiancé Matthew Koma. This time around, she’s experiencing a different set of problems which she joked about on Instagram.
“Sitting here thinking…gotta keep working on this body that was Banks’ apartment. A while ago…,” she said on her Instagram Story. “Give me my abs back. Are they in there? Hellllllo come back. I was thinking if I told my 14-year-old self that I would hang out in sweatpants that cover my belly button I think I would have vomited on the spot and laughed in your face.”