Last September, after more than three years of dating, Gwyneth Paltrow and Glee co-creator Brad Falchuck said “I do.” The couple got married in a private wedding ceremony in the Hamptons, surrounded by family and friends, including Robert Downey Jr.
“I’m excited about everything!” Paltrow told People at the time. “I’ve never had a wedding before. [Paltrow and ex-husband Chris Martin eloped in 2003.] So even though I’m 45, I sort of feel like a 21-year-old.”
For the most part, the couple have kept their relationship out of the spotlight. However, the Iron Man actress has recently caused quite the stir when she shared an unusual detail about her marriage.
In an interview with The Sunday Times, the Oscar winner and Goop founder revealed that she and Falchuck don’t live together full-time.
Paltrow explained that both she and Falchuck still have their own homes, and that they only live together four days a week. Whenever her husband has custody of his two children from a previous marriage, he stays at his home.
There were lots of people were quick to comment on how unconventional Paltrow and Falchuck’s arrangement is, but the actress insisted that many married couples she knows think otherwise.
“Oh, all my married friends say that the way we live sounds ideal and we shouldn’t change a thing,” the mother of two said.
TIME magazine turned to relationship expert and therapist Rachel Sussman to determine if this type of living situation is healthy for a couple. Turns out, it may actually make a relationship stronger.
“When you have young kids, it’s not always easy to fully blend a family,” Sussman told the publications. “Cheaper by the Dozen can glamorize or make it seem easy to blend families, but it can be complicated. And couples who blend families need to be aware of that, and be willing to think outside of the box.”
She added, “It’s good to miss someone, it’s good to look forward to seeing someone. You just have to make it work. With the divorce rate being what it is, I don’t know if living together with someone all the time is necessarily proven beneficial. I think what’s the most beneficial is the connection between the couple; that it’s a healthy union; that there’s love, trust, respect, communication and openness.”
While there are people who side with Paltrow, there are some like The View co-host Meghan McCain, who believe this type of situation is only ideal for those who are affluent.
“It seems like rich people stuff,” she said. “What if you can’t afford two houses? Come on, you guys.”
“I don’t try and judge anybody else’s marriage because you don’t know what goes on and what works for people,” she continued. “But the rent alone would be enough to make me angry … so I probably wouldn’t do it.”
For fans of Paltrow, this revelation shouldn’t come as a surprise. The Shallow Hal star isn’t one to always abide by tradition. In 2015, when announcing her split from then-husband Chris Martin, the actress re-introduced the world to the concept of “consciously uncoupling.”
An article on the Goop website, explains the concept as follows the ability to “recognize that our partners in our intimate relationships are our teachers, helping us evolve our internal, spiritual support structure.” If we are able to do this, then “we can avoid the drama of divorce and experience what we call a conscious uncoupling.”
“The idea of conscious uncoupling is to gain enough self-awareness that we no longer have to do it anymore because we’ve now found ourselves in a fulfilling, sustainable, long-term relationship,” it continued. “When we understand that both are actually partners in each other’s spiritual progress, animosity dissolves much quicker and a new paradigm for conscious uncoupling emerges, replacing the traditional, contentious divorce.”