Should I (48m) tell my wife (44f) that I received a sex tape of her in the mail?

Throwaway.

This is an odd thing. Wife and I have been married 20 years. I’ve never suspected her of cheating and our sex life has been outstanding.

First of the year, I receive a package in the mail. It’s a DVD addressed to me, and a typed note that says “your eyes only”. It’s my wife having sex , separately, with three guys. She was younger, much younger, based on body and appearance and hair style it was around the time we were going out—either before, during, or after we were engaged (she grew her hair longer for the wedding and kept it that way).

First I’ve no idea who sent it to me other than one of those three guys in the DVD – none of which I know. I’m assuming it’s one of my wife’s ex. Second I’ve know idea why they sent it. Are they trying to say she was screwing around on me? The tape isn’t time stamped so I don’t have a frame of reference. She kept her hair short for years until we were engaged so it could have been during a block of time, certainly before we dated.

And also what are they trying to achieve if this was taken before we dated? I know my wife had other partners. Hell I had three times the partners she did before we married but that was 20 years ago I think we’re past that. But apparently this person or persons isn’t.

The whole thing is strange. I’m not sure what’s going on. I haven’t told my wife, I’m not sure how she would take it. She’s very sexual and adventurous but I don’t think she’d like the idea of her past catching up to her. But I don’t think I’ll get to the bottom of this unless I tell her.

submitted by /u/thrownitawaystdy to r/relationship_advice
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